Jun 01 2010
I don’t like the engagement ring my fiance bought me.. he was being cheap with it. Should I tell him?
It’s not a 2 carat platinum like I hoped for.. he got me a one carat white gold ring. I hope he doesn’t do this with the wedding ring. You know how embarassed I’ll be? Should I tell him or exchange it for something else on my own?
50 Responses to “I don’t like the engagement ring my fiance bought me.. he was being cheap with it. Should I tell him?”
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If you can’t discuss something so small as a ring, you’re not ready to get married.
Wow. I think you should be happy with what you got. If you truly love him then the ring doesn’t matter.
how shallow!!!! you should be happy to have found someone willing to marry you!!!
Get a job and buy your own.
Are you marrying him or the ring? If you want a bigger and better ring. Do what I do, I work very hard and buy my own diamonds. Don’t be so ungrateful. You are coming across as a goldigger… God bless****
yes, it was the little thing that tore my parents apart. It was because they kept it inside, and now they are divored, you have to be totally honest.
You’re a very selfish girl. How can you live with yourself? It doesnt matter how many carats the ring has! What matters is if he loves you, and the ring is a symbol of love, not of wealth. If you’re embarrassed of wearing a one carat wedding ring, you dont deserve to be married!
You are being so selfish right now. And very materialistic. I cant believe I am hearing this. You should be ashamed. He bought you a ring. He wants to marry you. Isnt that what is important.
Maybe he can’t afford to get you the massive diamond that you want. You should NOT exchange it on your own. On the one hand I think the woman should have a say in the ring she wears for life, but on the other hand, I might be a bit upset if I was a guy and you told me you didn’t like the ring. Do you not like it because it’s smaller or is the style just that awful you can’t live with it?
This is a really snotty question. I can understand it wasn’t the “ring you hoped for” but do you think that maybe he could not afford the ring you hoped for? He obviously tried to get you something close to what you wanted.
No, you do not tell him!!!! You wear it and as far as the wedding rings go, insist that the two of you go together to pick them out! That way you can be sure you are getting what you want.
Also, do not exchange the ring. Thats just so tacky!
You should be grateful for what ever he got you. You seem like a whiny self absorbed brat.
you are whining because he only bought you 1 carat????? does it even matter to you that he bought it for you with the best of intention’s!!
I personally think a 1 carat white gold is great, maybe he couldn’t afford anything else…The ring is not what counts your lucky you were given one.
Did you ever show him things you’ve liked?
I wouldn’t tell him a 1 carat doesn’t exactly sound dreadful.
All I have to say, and I’m not trying to be rude or mean, I don’t think you’re ready to marry this man at all! I would advise calling it off before either of you get hurt!
I think it’s pretty funny that 4 days ago you just met your boyfriend on match.com but you didn’t use your own picture and now you have an engagement ring. Stop trying to make women look bad and while you’re at it – GET A LIFE.
Why are you so concerned about the ring that your fiance has given you? You should be thankful and blessed that this man wants to marry you and spend the rest of his life with you! Besides, you have to understand that money won’t by you love, friendships, relationships, and happiness! I think the best thing for you to do is to keep that ring on your finger and don’t take him for granted, because you don’t want to be considered as a “gold digger.” Good luck to you!
Yes, he is being cheap. If he loves you, he’ll get you what you want. Tell him or don’t marry him. What if he buys you a house with only two stories? You’d be more disappointed.
I think you are a lying liar and there is no ring or fiance. And with an attitude like that, there never will be. Have you ever hear, it’s the thought that counts? Who cares if it’s only 1/4 carat?
If you don’t like the ring I would tell him-it will bug your forever if you do not-that being said you probably should not tell him that you think he was being cheap-say something about the style not being right
Can your fiance afford a 2 carat platinum ring though-that could be a little more than he can afford or he may be one of those guys that does not see the appeal in spending a ton of money on an engagement ring
Can you BE any more shallow and materialistic? I hope your “fiance” reads this and sees what he’s in for if he marries you. Grow up and appreciate what he got you. To BOO HOO over a ONE CARAT DIAMOND shows you to be an immature, high maintenance, all about appearances B. Get over yourself.
OK, maybe he couldn’t afford the 2 carat ring. A one carat ring is still pretty nice and white gold can actually be more durable than platinum. Many women don’t even get that. If the setting is no what you like, have it re-st, but if it is that the diamond is not big enough then you should not say anything to him. he would be very hurt. and don’t replace yourself, that is wrong. he bought the ring for you be case he loves you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you. So it is not big enough, you at least have someone who wants to be with you. Move past it or get it re-set so it looks bigger and start having fun being engaged and planning your wedding!
You are a shallow BIATCH as far as I am concerned—-how selfish of you and HOW RUDE…. here this guy buys you a LARGE diamond and it’s not enough? is ANYTHING this guy does for you ever going to be enough——a ring is supposed to be a SYMBOL OF LOVE, not a symbol of anyone’s bank account…. I think you would be doing this poor guy a FAVOR by breaking up with him and RETURNING the ring….you sound like a spoiled selfish BRAT to me and who wants that kind of woman as a WIFE…. by the way, as my name suggests I am FEMALE but what it doesn’t suggest is that I am probably old enough to be YOUR MOTHER and if I WAS your mother, I would be TOTALLY ASHAMED of the way you are acting over this ring…. GROW UP.
I cannot believe you are serously complaining and affraid to feel embarrased. An engagement is a serious commitment. I don’t think he would go cheap just cause he doesn’t care. You are wearing a ring that proves his love for you. What, do you not love him the same for not giving you 2 carats n a platnum band? I don’t know where he stands financially. Maybe that’s all he can afford for now. If he bought you that ring it was because he thought you might like it. Why would you go and get something else, and biggger without talking to him. If you really are not satisfied with the ring, then talk to him. Let him know, but let me tell you I’d love to hear you tell him why you are not satisfied, and then see the look on his face.
Wow… I really hope he dumps you.
He knew that you didn’t like yellow gold, so give him credit for that. Perhaps he was told by a relative that engagement rings should be made out of gold – not the hip, trendy metal of the moment (like platinum is now. 10 years from now it might be titanium or copper for all I know).
Besides, maybe he thinks that saving his money for your MARRIAGE is more important that going into debt for the sake of a ring. If you are this EMBARASSED by this ring, then you need to tell him exactly what is bothering you – but be prepared to have his offer of marriage recinded.
If you are willing to be single again, then by all means, go and exchange this meaningful token for something that will only cause division in your personal relationship and only impress your friends for 5 minutes until one of them gets a bigger ring.
You should leave him because he deserves BETTER than you. That is so selfish…don’t you love this man??? I thought it was the love that mattered not the jewlery. Go find a man that can get you a 2 carat platinum ring. Let your fiancee go and find REAL love…someone who will be honored to get a 1 carat white gold ring.
I hope you know you sound very shallow.
Be happy with what you got.
If you truly love him, then what kind of ring you got wouldn’t matter.
wow…. thats really all i have to say
Fake question guys. That or her other questions are the fake ones. Regardless, she doesnt deserve all the attetion shes getting from this question. Check out her other questions, I think she’s looking to get a rise out of people.
embarrassed because someone loved you enough to give you a token of their love and want to spend the rest of their life with you?
the idea of you not being greatful for what you have been given is very insulting. you could easily destroy your relationship by being so superficial and worried about what others are going to think about your ring. Maybe 2k was out of his price range. have you ever thought of that?
also, maybe he understands that white gold lasts longer than platinum and it doesn’t bend as easy. Maybe he realized that it would be smarter to save some of the extra money spent on a larger ring to possibly buy a house, or put it towards an outstanding honeymoon for the two of you.
it sounds to me that this guy, who has taken his hard earned money and his valuable time, to find something nice to show his devotion towards you, would probably be better off with someone who is not so concerned with being embarrassed by having a 1k ring in stead of 2k. that is so shallow.
and this is coming from someone who got the 2k.
do you want to marry your fiance or a ring?
he bought you what he could afford and thought was appropriate.
and believe me, 2 carats is annoying.
he loves you for you. its not the size of the ring its the size of his love for you that counts. a lot better than 2 carats.
don’t think so much about the ring itself. think about the feeling of love he had when he asked you to marry him. wait untill after you are married then on your 1st aniversary ask for the ring set you really want. just have patience and eventually you will grow to love the one that was given in love or you get a new one for your aniversary. oh and by the way congradulations.
Do you honestly think he wouldn’t notice that suddenly you’ve got a rock twice the size of the one he gave you?
Frankly, I think he’s the one who needs to do a bit of exchanging. You’re in no way ready to get married if you’ll be embarrassed by him not spending a fortune on the ring.
For the record, my engagement ring cost $89 and my wedding ring was free, since it was inherited. In two days I’ll celebrate fourteen years of blissful marriage to a guy who knows there’s more to love than a giant diamond.
I will try to hold off on judging you, but based on this question it does appear that you may be materialistic and selfish. Another person may have hit the nail on the head when they said “if you can’t handle this problem, you probably are not ready for marriage”.
Why do you feel the need to have a $30,000 ring on your hand to prove he loves you? Perhaps the 1 carat diamond he got you is of high color, cut, and clarity? I would suspect if he got you a 2 carat diamond he would be forced to get a J color with S2 clarity at best. With diamonds size shouldn’t matter as much as the other C’s.
Perhaps you could focus more on the relationship and less on the rock. In any case, I would suggest you tell him how much this bothers you so he has an idea of the type of person he is marrying.
Who do you think you’re marrying? Bill Gates Jr.? I dont think you deserve that ring. Maybe he’ll see the gold digging psycho you are and bail on you!
Sounds like you want a wedding – not a marriage.
You need to GIVE THE RING BACK and grow up before you do an adult thing like choosing a partner for the rest of your life.
Oy.
Please don’t feed the trolls.
It’s funny that I want the same exact one you were hoping for, but have a feeling i will get the one you got. 1 carat, white gold.. is not cheap… at least its a carat. But if you want, just tell him that you really wanted the other one… so save up for it, and then exchange it… which is also not that good of an idea… because he really didn’t kneel and give you the platinum one… so will it have the same significance?
I think you should be amazed he got you a ring at all, since according to your previous posts, he spends all his money at strip clubs and you are the one supporting both of you. I would think that since you are the one supporting both of you then you know how difficult that is and should appreciate any ring he gets you. I see nothing wrong with a 1 carat white gold ring. There are a lot of women who dont even get that. The ring is not important, it is the marriage that is important. From reading your previous posts I think you need to seriously consider whether you want to get married at all based on his irresponsibility and your shallowness. If a ring holds that much importance to you then you are not mature enough to be getting married. If you truly loved him you would be happy with a ring from a candy machine because a piece of jewelry does not in any way compare to love.
what if this is all he can afford
Obviously you wanted this ring for all the wrong reasons. Most girls dont get good rings and that is a pretty decent ring and it obviously came from his heart, I really cant see that ring being cheap unless the diamond is crap. Most of the 2 k diamonds I Have seen are dirty and ugly unless your fiance is will to fork out at least 25 k just for the diamond, you diamond will look like crap.
Oh my gosh, I should be so ashamed. I only have a 1/2 carate set in yellow gold….how will I ever be able to live with myself!? He needs to dump you and find someone appreciative and not full of herself.
All I can say is materialistic. You are not ready to get married. You need to grow up.
Be greatful for what you got.
and what exactly did you get HIM? i realize that we all have ideals but come on honey! do you love him or what you want him to give you?
Is this a serious question? I hope not… but if it is, can you really tell the difference between a 1-carat white gold and a 2-carat platinum? A 1-carat diamond isn’t “cheap” and I’m sure most (if not all) of your wedding guests and friends later in life will never know the difference. You shouldn’t be getting married if this is all you care about. JMO.
You should throw it in his face and then spit on him. Tell him he better not fail you next time.
OMG get a grip that is a nice sized ring. Platinum does not keep its shine it needs to be treated, Be thankful he wants to marry you!
You’re not being shallow. Everyone is entitled to like what he or she like. If your engagement ring is not up to your standards, then by all means let him know. However, PLEASE do it in a tactful manner. Some guys can really bruise emotionally over the let down of selecting the wrong style ring. It’s important that he knows what your likes are. Since your concerned about your wedding ring, you should be involved in the selection process, it seems like you like the traditional approach to this engagement and wedding ring selection. It’s important that your desires are met in this process, after all you would’t dear walk down the aisle in a dress selected by someone else. The ring is a symbol, and there’s nothing wrong with assisting with the selection of a symbol that you’ll be wearing at all times. Do not change it on your own, that’s just mean and it will unfortunately set a negative tone on the beginning of your union.
My best friend hated her engagement ring and eventually it came out in a nasty argument.
So far there is no talk of them getting married. My other friend hated her yellow gold engagement/wedding band set that she no longer wears it. I love, love, love my ring…why? Because I selected after returning the ring I was proposed with.
HAPPY Engagement!
who do you think you are, paris hilton?
a one carat white gold ring is very, very expensive.
get over yourself and be glad anyone wants to marry you at all.
it’s one thing if you don’t like the cut or the setting, but it sounds like it’s all about size to you, which is pretty tacky.
Do you love your man? Did you love him before you had a ring? Maybe he couldnt afford the ring you wanted and was too embarrassed to tell you. How would you feel if you were in his shoes? Doesnt sound to me like you are worried about his point of view at all and that doesnt sound like a good start to a marriage. Ask him first. Find out what happened. If he couldnt afford it then maybe he can save for something before the wedding and you can trade the one you have for a “better” one. If he just got that one because then you have more problems to deal with…