Mar 21 2010
When you die, will you be buried with or without your jewelry?
Ok so here’s the story…..my grandmother recently passed away 
she stated that before she died that she wanted to be buried with all of her good jewelry on. Like her wedding band, her original engagement band (that has been passed down for like 100 years and now she didn’t wanna pass it down) and a bunch of really nice antique necklaces with diamonds and then some big diamond earrings. Well, now all my cousins and aunts are fighting over who gets to keep the jewelry! I think even though the jewelry is very expensive that we should keep her wishes and bury her with it, but everyone else in my family thinks in ridiculous for wanting that? what do you think?
27 Responses to “When you die, will you be buried with or without your jewelry?”
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I will not be buried, I am a body donor, no funeral, no viewing, on expence for my kids, every one happy.
If there is a written will then there is nothing that can be done about it.. those are her last wishes and the exc. of the estate has to carry them out.. and your family should stop being greedy.. they were hers in life they should be hers in death..I personally will not take any with me..
Always abide to the wishes of the dead. Period.
I think the ones that have been passed down from one generation to another is not actually “hers”!! That should have been passed to another family member!! What she accumulated herself let her have it!! I personally think it’s a selfish thing to do!! And, sometimes the funeral home ends up with them!!!
I wont be burried, I will be creamated…. I dont like the idea of being put into a dark and cold ground because I do not like the dark. So, all my jewelry will be given to my daughters.
you have to put in something for the archaeologists in the future to find, and as you cant eat it only look at it why not.
I that was her wish, it should be respected. It sounds like she did not put it in her will, if she had there would be no dispute. I’m sorry your family is going through this, and that you are caught in the middle. That is why it is so important that we have wills and state our wishes. To answer your question,no,Just my original gold wedding band. The rest has been left to my daughter, with one ring going to my son.
First of all, I am so sorry for your loss. Grandmothers are special and irreplaceable. My thoughts go out to you and your family.
As for your question, this is a very subjective situation. When a person says they want to be buried wearing certain jewelry, sometimes they don’t actually mean they want the jewelry literally buried with them. It can mean they want to be wearing it for the funeral services, since when many people think about their death, it’s their body in the casket they visualize. They tend to avoid the idea that their body will actually be in the ground permanently. It is for this reason that many funeral homes will suggest you do not bury your loved one with any valuables.
I think the best solution would be to keep the jewelry and bury her without it, or possibly with just her wedding band. I think any pieces that have been passed down in the family should continue to be passed down through the generations. That is, unless your Grandmother specifically said she did not want any of the jewelry passed down anymore.
It is unfortunate that your family is fighting over who keeps the jewelry. Even a very expensive, important piece of heirloom jewelry cannot replace the memories of your grandmother. I would suggest to your family that they not hurt each other or taint good memories of your grandmother by fighting over material possessions, no matter how important they think those possessions are.
I think it’s ridiculous to be buried with anything of monetary value.
The wishes are ridiculous and should NOT be honored. Put all the jewelry on her in the coffin for viewing, and then if people can’t decide of splitting it up, it should go to auction and all of the family share in the proceeds according to how the other assets of the estate as distributed.
If it were my grandmother and they planned to bury a fortune in the ground, I’d be getting a court injunction. She wasn’t in her right mind when she made that decision. My mother made a real goofy request also, but we knew she had dementia at the time, and after a small discussion, we went with the type of will she had written 30 years previous.
What a shame to have people fighting over such things. I don’t understand either side. It is a selfish gesture to want these valuable items buried with a person, just as it is selfish to indulge in an argument over possession of such. I plan to leave my jewelry to my family and specify that some of it should go to both granddaughters and grandsons alike.
Also, who is to say that the jewelry will remain in the casket? It could easily be removed without the family knowing.
I will not be buried and taking valuables with you is just asking to be dug back up by grave robbers.
Your grandmother is well aware of the nature of the persons that she is related to and I am sure this gave her some laughs observing their reaction(s) in life.
I am to be cremated and my jewelry given to my granddaughters. I am leaving a will as to who gets what as I have 4 granddaughters. My grandson will have his great grandfather’s jewelry, his watch and rings. If you don’t leave a will there will be fighting and hard feelings that may not recover. Poppy
If that her wishes it should be carried out. But I don’t want to buried with my jewelry, not that I have expensive jewelry
An executor does not “have” to carry out any particular requests made by the deceased. Generally they do, but they don’t have to.
Burying valuables is not a good idea.
What good comes of it?
You might just as well as put a cheque in the casket.
Her wishes should come first. She knew there would be battles over her jewelry so she wanted all of it to to stay on her and with her. If she had a will it would be illegal to change any part of it. Who are they to say her last wish was ridiculous. Mine will go to my daughters.
Well your question is “will you be buried with or without your jewelry?”
So my answer is:
How my remains will be treated will be up to whomever I leave behind.
I slightly prefer cremation.
Although it’s tempting to occupy land – in the hopes that a building won’t.
Had you asked what I would do in your circumstances my answer would be:
Respect the wishes of your grandmother and hope the undertaker is honest.
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I have requested that I be cremated when I die. I will not have any jewelry on me. I don’t care what happens to my earthly possessions but I certainly would not want them buried in a grave. I have a will prepared.
Since your grandmother didn’t want to pass the jewelry down to someone in the family then why not not donate it to a worthy charity? You would be doing something good with the jewelry. If it all goes to the charity then all the cousins and aunts wouldn’t have the jewelry to fight over. I bet your grandmother knew this would happen after her death.
Who is the executor of the estate? This is the person who is legally responsible to make this decision.
No, I will be cremated and I think it is very interesting that your grandmother doesn’t want to pass on things that have been in the family for such a long time. I wonder if she is just pulling your chain?
to answer your question, these days because of lack of land space and donating parts, etc. people are being cremated so there is no room for the jewelry. There used to be such a thing as grave robbers and I believe that still exists, so to save the caretakers of the cemetery additional costs and insurance costs any jewelry is given to the loved ones before the casket or box is closed.
No, don’t have anyone buried with their jewelry even if they want it that way. Jewelry can be sold and the money distributed to the living heirs of the will. Fighting over items is common, but I’m thinking this day and age that the relatives just want the money from the jewelry.
I believe they are stolen by the funeral home workers so I will give my stuff to family!
Why not just bury all her money with her too? I’m planning on being buried with just my simple gold claddah wedding band. All the rest my daughter can have. People make unwise decisions all the time. No need to encourage her. After she passes away she wont know anyway what happened to her jewelry. Divide up the jewelry. What we did in one case was to draw cards. The highest got the first pick etc. It took all the favoritism out of it.
From what I understand funeral directors do not bury deceased with expensive jewelry on..but I could be wrong!
I will not be buried. My organs and tissue will be donated; then what is left will be used for research and teaching purposes.
She is a spiteful person and has broken tradition by not passing it down.
But that said, it is all just stuff. The funeral home will not like being responsible for the stuff on her while she is in viewing.
I will not be buried with any jewelry.
Without.